Gillious Soler

Hello. I’m a psychotherapist with over 10 years of experience helping veterans, high-distress professionals, and adults who appear capable and high-functioning while privately feeling overwhelmed, emotionally dysregulated, stuck, or out of control.

I specialize in PTSD, complex trauma, anxiety, ADHD, emotional dysregulation, urges, impulsivity, compulsive behaviors, guilt, and shame. I understand the pressure of carrying significant responsibility while struggling internally with symptoms that affect relationships, confidence, decision-making, and daily functioning. My approach is warm, direct, trauma-informed, and practical, with a strong emphasis on structure, accountability, and results clients can recognize in their everyday lives.

This is not passive or surface-level therapy. Together, we identify the patterns driving your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors and develop practical strategies to improve regulation, strengthen boundaries, reduce internal conflict, and create lasting change. The goal is not simply to talk about what is happening, but to help you understand it, respond differently, and regain a greater sense of stability and control.

I am a paneled psychotherapist with VA Community Care Network Regions 1, 2, and 3 and have extensive experience working with veterans navigating combat and non-combat trauma, PTSD, major life transitions, relationship concerns, anger, anxiety, and the challenges of functioning under prolonged stress. I am also independently paneled with select insurance plans and accept many additional insurance plans through the Headway platform.

I currently offer in-person sessions in Montclair, New Jersey, on Mondays, as well as virtual therapy throughout New Jersey. In Pennsylvania, I offer in-person sessions in Allentown every other Wednesday and virtual therapy statewide. Virtual therapy is also available throughout New York.

My approach to therapy is structured, direct, trauma-informed, and focused on meaningful progress. Therapy should provide more than a place to talk. It should help you better understand yourself, develop useful tools, and begin making changes in the areas that matter most to you.

I use evidence-based approaches, including cognitive behavioral therapy, compassion-focused interventions, and emotional regulation skills. I work particularly well with veterans, high-stress professionals, and adults who function well on the outside but privately struggle with anxiety, trauma, ADHD-related challenges, emotional dysregulation, urges, impulsivity, shame, or behaviors that feel difficult to manage.

During our work together, we look closely at the experiences and patterns influencing your thoughts, emotions, decisions, and relationships. I take an active role in therapy by asking thoughtful questions, offering honest feedback, teaching practical strategies, and providing compassionate accountability. Sessions are collaborative and focused on what is currently keeping you stuck.

Many of my clients have made sufficient progress to successfully complete therapy in as little as six to nine months. The length of treatment varies, however, based on each person’s needs, goals, clinical circumstances, readiness, and consistency.

Our work may help you become more aware of your patterns, manage difficult emotions more effectively, make healthier decisions, establish stronger boundaries, and respond more intentionally to triggers and urges. The overall goal is to create changes that carry into your daily life and relationships.

Your first session is an opportunity for us to understand what brings you to therapy, what is no longer working, and what you would like to change. You will have space to discuss concerns such as anxiety, trauma, ADHD-related challenges, relationship stress, emotional dysregulation, urges, impulsivity, or patterns that feel difficult to manage.

I take an active role by listening carefully and asking direct, thoughtful questions to understand your experiences and identify the patterns affecting your thoughts, emotions, behaviors, decisions, and relationships. We will also begin exploring important triggers, current coping strategies, personal strengths, and any barriers that may be keeping you stuck.

You can expect the session to be structured, collaborative, and focused. By the end of our initial meeting, we will begin identifying your priorities and developing a clear direction for treatment. Many clients leave with a better understanding of what they are experiencing and what the next steps may look like.

The first session is not about solving everything at once. It is about establishing trust, gaining clarity, and beginning to create a practical treatment plan based on your individual needs and goals.